About seven years ago, I was having some serious stomach
issues. Chron’s Disease (a disease that
affects the digestive system, affecting absolutely any part of the digestive
tract from the mouth to the anus) runs in my family, so my doctor recommended
that I get a colonoscopy done just in case I also had the illness. Sounds like loads of fun, right? Sense the dripping sarcasm…
A colonoscopy is a procedure that allows doctors to exam the
large colon and part of the small bowel with a fiber optic camera that is on a
tube. How does the camera get into the
colon, you ask? Through the anus. Lovely.
So to prepare for this absolutely wonderful procedure, I was
instructed to consume a large amount of laxatives and told not to eat for an
entire 24 hours. All I could do was
drink Gatorade and poop. I spent so much
time in the bathroom that the toilet seat was constantly warm. It was not one of my best days.
The morning of the colonoscopy, I was sleepy, hungry and irritable. I don’t care what you say—spending an entire
day in the bathroom while unable to eat would put anyone in a bad mood.
I was put to sleep for the colonoscopy, thankfully. It was still uncomfortable knowing that once
I passed out, the doctors were going to spread apart my bum cheeks and stick a
camera up into my colon and small bowel.
But I needed to know if I had Chron’s.
I woke up after the procedure loopy as a lush and ready for
a Big Mac from McDonald’s (not my proudest nutritional moment).
Turns out that I was free and clear of Chron’s. Phew.
Have any of you had the pleasure of a colonoscopy?